Thank You for Being a Friend by Andrew Gold

“Golden Girls" opening credits
“Thank You For Being A Friend" Andrew Gold music video

I love watching television.

It’s not so much about sitting in front of the T.V. mindlessly zoned out flipping through channels for hours on end (which I have probably spent too much of my life doing). It's about the many moments watching shows with people in my life. Watching the first episode of American Idol from season 1 with a group my fraternity brothers was hilarious fun. Loving the subtle in-jokes and self-referential humor of The Simpsons with my brother is something I always enjoy. Elating in pure joy when Jim and Pam finally got together in The Office was a great moment I shared with my wife.

Then there’s watching television with my mom.

If you ask my mom how she learned to speak English and what American culture was truly about she will credit television shows. When she first came to America in the late 1970s the show that captured her imagination was I Love Lucy. Even though a Cuban with broken English and a red head from Oklahoma weren’t exactly the best examples of how to speak proper English, my mom learned the dynamics of the English language and the themes that define American culture.

I remember many afternoons, especially during the summer when my mom would stop whatever she was doing to watch I Love Lucy . The other show that I have clear memories of watching with my mom is The Golden Girls and oh my God, what a show that was: four old ladies sharing a house in Florida talking about sex (well, there were some other subtleties in the plot, but that was pretty much the main “thrust” of the show).

While we live in a time of reality shows and 24 hour cable channels, the 1980s were the glory days of the situation-comedy. Half-hour shows with a live studio audience which were defined by shows like I Love Lucy had widespread appeal in the 1980s with shows like Cheers and Family Ties.

The Golden Girls, which aired from 1985 to 1992, featured Beatrice Arthur as Dorothy Zbornak; Betty White as Rose Nylund; Rue McClanahan as Blanche Devereaux; and Estelle Getty as Sophia Petrillo, Dorothy's mother. Each woman had fully developed and intriguing back stories. Dorothy was recently divorced and sarcastic acting as the most reasonable voice in the house. Rose, a widow and my personal favorite character, was often seemed naive but every once in a while displayed a superior intelligence and insight into human heart. Blanche was basically, well, really horny, crass and constantly talked about sex. Then there is Sophia who was old and cranky but sometimes offered motherly guidance to the other woman in the house.

What is genius about this show is that the setting and actresses put across an image of innocents that we sometimes seem to have about the elderly. It is within this illusion that the show talked about topics like homosexuality, gun control, impotence, domestic violence, euthanasia, sexual abuse, senility, AIDs and many other relevant issues. Because of the age of these characters, they often lived these issues and talked about them in a frank and honest way, often resulting in hilarity (check out this scene when they are buying condoms or this great scene when they watch porn). Though, shocking to hear these topics talked about in such an open way, the fact that it was our grandmothers who were talking about this stuff, though disturbing, reflecting a maturity and perspective that comes from living a long life that reveals truths about issues that so often give us pause.

The theme song to The Golden Girls, “Thank You for Being a Friend” like so many great television theme songs became synonymous with the show. In the 1980s the theme song accompanied the opening credits which introduced the main characters and gave glimpses of the content of the episodes. The theme songs acted as emotional capsules, distilling the stories and themes into the show into one clear emotional statement. “Thank You For Being A Friend” really is everything that The Golden Girls is about.

Andrew Gold recorded “Thank You for Being a Friend” for this third album All This and Heaven Too in 1978. The song was a moderate success reaching #25 on the charts but it was when it by Cynthia Fee for The Golden Girls that the theme song got a second life.

The song starts with the hook, “Thank You for Being a Friend.” It works through the chorus until “and if you threw a party” in which the harmony changes to a darker minor feel. This section goes beyond merely thanking the friend but talks about a specific situation. It builds back up to the hook “Thank You for Being a Friend” and then the strings take over to a wrap up the theme song with a beautiful bow.

So that’s the version from the television show and Andrew Gold’s version goes on for another four minutes. The other four minutes are more of the same. The next verse talks about buying a car if needed (rhyming “lack” with Cadillac). The song ends talking about being friends through old age and also seeing each other after death.

All of meaningful relationships in our lives boil down to being friends including our relationships with our spouses, partners, siblings, parent and well of course, friends. “Thank You for Being a Friend” reminds us of how good it feels to have friends in our lives and how much the simple act of friendship really means.

"It's been an experiences I'll always keep close to my heart and that these are memories that I'll wrap myself in when the world gets cold, and I forget that there are people who are warm and loving."
-Dorothy saying goodbye on the final episode