Monday, March 13, 2017

Parenthood: Week 195 – The One Reason

I saw a video for exercise class for dads in which they can hold their babies in their carriers while they work out. It’s a cute idea, but it’s not really very long that you can hold your baby in a carrier. Also, the amount of time when that baby rests in the carrier and doesn’t react to the outside so you can do aerobics world is even shorter.

I’ve been thinking about this lately because Ollie is getting older. He’s wonderfully independent in many ways and as much as I love the fact that Ollie can go to the bathroom without any help, part of me is not ready for this level of maturity.

Over the weekend after lunch, I climbed into bed with Ollie, and we got cozy (which means we both cuddle up underneath the covers). We read a stack of books together, at least four, and then he falls to sleep in my arms. I get up after dozing for ten minutes and let him have his afternoon nap.

We live in a chaotic, dark and seemingly pessimistic world but there are moments that bring peace to the heart and the mind in a way that rejuvenates, sustains and reminds us of the beauty of the humanity that gives us the hope. Reading a book to a child and cuddling him to sleep is one of those human experiences makes life beautiful.

Ollie’s current favorite book is Corduroy. It’s that book about the bear who is missing a button, goes to find one and is later bought by a girl.   I remember this book as a child and the fact that that the girl is African-American. It’s book about finding one’s place in the world. It’s about being accepted for who you are and accepting others. It’s about finding a home, not in a palace but in a fourth-story walk up.

I can tell Ollie all of these things, but through books like Corduroy, he sees there is a shared humanity, that the value in our house exist in the lives others. Books are reminders that we are not alone.

I can make Ollie feel secure, safe and loved enough to let go into sleep knowing that the world he knows and the people he loves will be there when he wakes up. It is what we give to others that defines humanity and the gift of peace, I can give to Ollie is one of the things that makes my life worth living.

There are a million reasons to not have a kid. But there’s one reason to have a child.  It's in that feeling of falling asleep with my son.

That feeling is infinite.

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