Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Grades And "Comments"

One things that is unique about my school is that in addition to grades, teachers write comments about students.  The classroom teachers write 2-3 pages for each student.  As the music teacher I write about 200 words of comments.  These comments have to be written very carefully as they are not only for the parents and the students but are part of a larger narrative record.  As I write these comments, other observations and thoughts about my students pop up.  Here are some of these comments that didn't quite make the cut (many of these are actual observations while others are made-up thoughts and not based on any actual student):   

Middle School
"_______is unmemorable."
"_______makes jokes that are not funny. . . at all."
"_______needs to learn how to tie her shoes. "
"_______needs to stop pumping his fist in the air every time we finish a song."
"_______liked the "Jasmine Flower" song a little bit too much."
"_______cried less than he did during the first semester."
"_______looks really dumb when he plays the clarinet."
"_______is a student that I am afraid to make mad because I fear that she could beat me up."
"_______looked way better before she straightened her awesome Felicity/Taylor Swift hair."
"_______is going be a students I'm really going to miss next year."
"_______dresses like nobody else in her grade and I totally love that about her."
"_______is a student I wish I could say that I'm proud of."
"_______needs to not sit on girl's laps."
"_______gives me hope for the American teenager."
"_______has powerful puppy dog eyes."
"_______is lazy like woah."
"_______needs to expand his monotone wardrobe."
"_______should never change, ever."
"_______ran into a wall and it was really funny."

Fifth Grade
"_______should consider beet farming because he walks like Dwight Shurte"
"_______ate half of his music folder.
"_______came up with the term "wet sweet" after an especially hot day."
"_______thought "Living On A Prayer," was "Living On a Prairie."
"_______needs to grow into her own ears."
"_______reminds me of my dog. . . in a good way."
"_______wore the same summer dress as one of her classmate, twice."
"_______thing where she only has one of her ears pierced needs to be addressed."
"_______always has really nice hair."
"_______is too tall."
"_______fell off his chair in class."
"_______would benefit from knowing whether of not he/she is the evil twin."
"_______reminds me of my dog. . . and not in a good way."
"_______is not as cool as she thinks she is."
"_______rolls around on the floor too much."

Third Grade
"_______ needs to develop a personality"
"_______seems to be more interested in his hand than music class"
"_______often blows into the wrong end of the recorder"
"_______still does not know how to tie her shoes
"_______would get a higher grade if he wasn't on crutches."
"_______really think he's funny, but he's not."
"_______farted in class."
"_______needs to not have an that early Justin Bieber Haircut."
"_______has really dirty fingernails."
"_______doesn't get it . . . ever."
"_______puts his hand down the front of his pants."
"_______doesn't understand that hand drums are played with your hands, not your head."
"_______sneezed on me."
"_______thinks that if you google 'bomb' the FBI will come to your house."
"_______doesn't understand the difference between 'stand up' and 'sit down.'"

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