One night last week, he tried everything. First he wanted “mommy hugs,” and then “daddy hugs.” There was the issue of socks. He asked to use the potty, for a drink of water and a diaper change. In between all of these requests, we left him alone in his crib where he persisted in asking for things for almost an hour.
Then he started screaming “BUUUUFFYYYYYYY!”
I walked in and saw him standing up in his crib smiling as he asked “Buffy huggle?” I turned around and saw Buffy standing in the doorway. I replied, “Okay, fine, Buffy huggle and then you go to sleep, okay?” Ollie reached his arms out in agreement.
I picked Buffy up and brought her close to Ollie. He reached around her head with his arms and leaned his head down onto her mane. After a couple seconds Ollie said with satisfaction “all done” and calmly lay himself down in his crib and went to sleep.
Giving Ollie a bath has always felt like a chore to me. When Diana gives Ollie a bath, she gives him time to play and gets into it. I’m much more business like and I just get the job done. So it’s no surprise that Ollie often requests to take baths with Diana.
Last week, we were having one of those nights with Ollie. Dinner with Ollie didn’t go very well, I was tired and stressed from work. I really wanted to not have to do anything but that wasn’t a choice. So when Diana asked “Do you want to do the dishes or give Ollie a bath?” I initially leaned toward the dishes, but after not having a very positive experience with Ollie that evening, I wanted to turn it around so I chose the bath.
Now I had tried taking a shower with Ollie before. It didn’t go very well. It was before he could stand and I ended up holding him the entire time, which didn’t really work. But now Ollie is a toddler and he loves the splash pad so, I figured why not give it a try. Anyways I could get my shower done in the process and save some time.
Ollie was initially skeptical about the shower as I explained to him what we were going to do instead of a bath. But once Ollie saw me turn on the shower, he got really excited. I lifted Ollie into the bathtub and I joined him watching him squeal in joy as the water rained down on him.
We had a great time. He watched me shampoo my hair and he tried to do his own. We got soapy together and watched “bubbles go bye-bye” as we rinsed. I got a sense of joy and pride when washing Ollie when he was an infant but it wasn’t fun. Something about the kneeling at the side of the tub thing wasn’t really all that fun for me either. I could put on a show for Ollie and he would have fun but it didn’t do much for me.
Taking a shower with Ollie was fun for Ollie and me. Instead of me doing something for Ollie, we were doing something together, working through processes and bonding over the simple joy of getting clean.