Year 10: Week 8 - What I Love

What do you love to do and would perhaps do for free?


Waking my students up.

This past week, I played “If She Leaves Me,” by the Highwomen for my 5th graders. I asked my students to follow along with the lyrics and come up with the story of the song: a two sentence summary of what the song was about.


The first couple responses mentioned love, and one student was fixated on the reference to alcohol (they ARE 5th graders). In all three of my 5th grade classes eventually students started talking about gender. I could see that they were struggling with the fact that the singer, Brandi Carlile sings with a voice that the students identified as a woman and that the narrator was talking about a woman that she loved.

One student carefully asked if this song was about a woman who was in love with another woman, and a student in another class asked, “is this song about a Gay couple?” After each of these comments there was a silence in the room, and I could feel the anticipation as my students waited for my response.

Letting my excitement come through as a warm smile, I said “yes.”

I told them about how The Highwomen believed that everyone should have music and art that reflected their lives and experiences. I have songs that I can listen to that reflect my experience with my partner that I can use to reflect on my love and feel deeper about her. People in same-sex relationships should have the same thing. And I told them that this song is a wonderful story that we can all experience as it talks about themes that relate to all of our lives.

Some students were excited that their suspicions were affirmed, like they cracked some code. Others were clearly still processing this song, and for others the light bulbs inside of them were slowly brightening up into a look of thoughtful realization.

Saying Yes

I spend a lot of time discussing and meeting with other teachers, staff, administrators during my time at school. This sometimes means that my lesson planning is rushed or meals are skipped, but I do it because I love it.

There’s many ways to help other adults in a school, and there’s some ways to work with them to bring power and voice to others through collaboration. One of the most powerful ways to do this is to say, “yes.”

Sometimes saying yes is asking tough questions and finding nuggets of promise and realizations to highlight. Other times saying yes comes after other conversations over time and getting to a place where affirmation feels natural and authentic. Then there are times of spontaneity when saying “yes,” is sharing a joke, or a smile in the hallway,  which is more of an act of empathy than humor.

When I work with others, it makes me see other things and understand more about others and who I am. In a moment earlier this week, I realized a key to being comfortable with disagreement.

I have told my department that agreeing with each other isn’t a priority, but I never quite realized what it took to have this happen in a way that unified more than divided. Then it came it me as I was talking to a teacher: we are okay with disagreement if we understand that those we disagree with have given thought to their opinion, and that there is a common theme and value that is shared.