Parenthood: Week 340 – First Grade

First grade has this feeling that it’s the grade where “real school” starts. Yes, I know that the work in school during kindergarten, and junior kindergarten, are essential and critical, but that’s not howit always feels.

For many students, first grade is when they have desk for the first time. This means that the curriculum is more structured and less play based. For my little guy, it means regularly having homework, that really is work.

There isn’t some miraculous developmental leap that occurs the summer before first grade, it’s just the place that we have placed a shift in the school experience for children. In some ways it’s important that we reflect that at home, and in other ways it’s important to push against this.

The effectiveness of the work at school is dependent on the support at home for the work that happens in a school. The highest ranked schools are completely ineffective if the parents aren’t on board, and with parent support and commitment, schools that seem to be of a lower quality can successful serve the educational needs of students. This is why I fully support the work at my son’s school even though I don’t agree with everything about my son’s school.

I’ve been a teacher for fourteen years, and I have Master degree in education. I know what I’m talking about. While this means that I have strong opinions on how I feel that education should be in our country, I’m also smart enough to know that there are many different factors that affect education in our country. So my “agreement,” isn’t essential to supporting my son’s teachers.

Look, I think Ollie gets too much homework. I’m of the philosophy that children overall should get less homework and first graders shouldn’t get any. However, I’m still going to support Ollie in getting his homework done. Ollie needs to work within the structures that are given, and he needs to step up at school from the work he did last year. It’s difficult at times, but this is the push that the school administration and teachers feel is best, so let’s do it.

At other times at home, there’s no need for a push or a “step-up” to another grade. Ollie can play with the same toys, watch the same shows, and read the same books he enjoyed at home last year. He still gets to be as goofy around the house, and he gets to cuddle as much as he wants.  Home is a place of comfort, where you don’t have to have the answers, and instead of being a “grown-up,” you get to be yourself.

Ollie is sometimes really tired when he gets home from school. There’s a lot to manage socially and academically. I appreciate all that they do at school to push him in ways that make him grow. I want to support that at home, at the same time, I feel like he needs a break to not worry so much on how to be and to simply “be.”