Lucas has been in our lives for about three months, but it feels like he’s always been with us.
It’s incredible how quickly we have adjusted the new normal of having Lucas in our lives. Routines have clicked into place without much discussion. Each day has its challenges, there’s way too much to do, and we are tired. However, it all feels like the continuation of a story, a new chapter for sure, but not a new book.
Lucas is no longer a newborn. This scrunched up little one who displayed little awareness of the outside world, is now making eye contact, reaching out to touch things, trying to turn, over, and yes, smiling. It’s just in the past couple days that he has been smiling consistently. All of the milestones are great, but smiling is one of my favorites.
Ethan was a more dramatic baby than Lucas, and Ethan is also a more dramatic toddler than Ollie was when he was younger. Lucas has the most "skeptical baby face" out of my three boys, but that is beginning to melt more into a silly smile. Like Ollie he holds his hands tight, and is very observant and interested in the world. I look forward to seeing how his personality evolves other years.
I’m very proud of how Ethan and Ollie have transitioned into having a baby brother. Both of them make an effort to say "hello" to Lucas and try to play with him. Both of them will gently touch Lucas’ head when he is relaxed, and Ollie will often dance around and sing for Lucas. They are both affectionate and give Lucas kisses. We just have to be careful when Ethan hugs Lucas, because, well, Ethan can be very insistent about hugs.
Ethan and Ollie don’t seem to be jealous of Lucas. Ethan will sometimes ask or insist on a hug when one of us is holding Lucas. The thing is that Ethan was doing this before Lucas was born. Ethan is very assertive about his desire for hugs, regardless of the time of day, even at 4am.
Ollie has been very patient when we ask him to wait while we take care of Lucas. A new baby brother means that Ollie sometimes has to wait for one of us to play chess with us, listen to Diana reading to him over Lucas’ cries, and deal with me and Diana more sleep deprived, and sometimes less patience than we’d like to be. Yes, he has his moments and his struggles, but more often than not he’s doing a fantastic job as an older brother. Ollie is very kind to his brothers and while I like to think it has to do with the example that we are setting, a lot of this has to do with the fact that Ollie deep down inside is a very generous, gentle, and kind person.
Buffy is doing a great job with Lucas. She keeps an eye on him, and makes sure that he’s never alone in the house. I’m sure her calm presence helps him relax as it does for all of us. Ethan is very into Buffy’s food right now. He likes to sit next to her bowl as she eats and claims that he’s “just watching.” In reality he’s trying to eat Buffy’s kibble and pour the water into the food dish. On a recent walk, Ollie was taking great pride in teaching a friend how to play with Buffy. It was a lovely reminder how Ollie feels responsibility for Buffy as his pet but more as his sister.
Lucas is wonderful, and he continues to enrich all of our lives. We are all better because he is in our family, and I feel blessed to have him in my life.
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