As 2020 comes to a close, I wanted to somehow talk about what happened and what this year has meant to me. After a couple of weeks of thinking, I've settled on the twenty most impactful, emotional, and meaningful moments of the year. One of my goals with this blog to put more beauty, joy, and love on the internet, which so full of cruelty and callousness. However, it seems disingenuous this year to only focus on the good. So I will talk about difficult moments, and I'm not going to twist every entry into having a "silver lining" because there isn't always good that comes out of bad. Sometimes creating the meaning of tragedy can feel like gaslighting because sometimes, sadness is nothing more than loss.
20. When Super Me Becomes Super We
DC Super Hero Girls was my favorite show that my sons got obsessed with this year. It's a show that is everything that many superhero films and shows are not. It is funny, made for children, not focused on patriarchal ways of conflict resolution (e.g., fighting), and is racially diverse. It embraced teenage drama without stereotyping teenage girls and uses DC mythology to tell stories that creative, relationship-focused, and funny. It's a modern show that deals with tough issues. One of my favorite episodes has to do with cyberbullying, and it was addressed very well, and like all of the episodes were more about empathy than superpowers.
It's the only superhero show or film that I feel is appropriate for their ages (seven-years-old, and three-year-old), and it was really wonderful to share my own love of DC Comic through this show.
Over the summer, Ollie earned DC Super Hero Girl dolls with his sticker chart for school work and chores. There were some adorable moments of Ollie and Ethan playing with these dolls and observing Ollie comb their hair as Diana taught him.
Superheroes can be for adults, and they can be dark and gritty. Superheroes, as portrayed in DC Super Hero Girls, should also be young children and be colorful, fun, and feminist.
19. Lucas' Curly Hairs
It was heart-breaking when my mom wrote to me in an email, "we can't touch Lucas's curly hairs yet. "
After months of hope, lots of research, my parents had decided that we would not see each other this fall. This conclusion and the loss that would continue from so much time apart felt even sadder when thinking about Lucas' hair.
One of the wonderful things about having bi-racial children is that you can never be quite sure what you will get when it comes to hair. Lucas was born with hair like my other two sons, but what surprised us is as it grew longer, curls starter to develop. Little ringlets from on top of his head and the side of his head around his ears. It's super cute and something that is uniquely Lucas.
The last time I saw my parents was last December when Lucas was born, and they will likely not see him again until the summer. Effectively they will have missed out on being there for the first year of his life.
There are so many moments and changes that they have only experienced from afar.
There are so many things I love about Lucas. Every night right before I go to bed, I check on him. I tell him that I love him, and I gently feel the curls in his hair. It's a reminder of all that is magical and wonderful about this child and what my parents are missing.
My parents will hold Lucas, feel his curls between their fingers, and he gazes up at them, smiling.
It makes me sad to think that it can't happen now, but I am hopeful, knowing that it's only a matter of time.
18. Child COVID-19 tests
First, it was Lucas, not even one-year-old, sitting in the back seat of our mini-van, fussing and crying as we waited for his turn to get his COVID-19 test. There were no appointments, and the wait was much longer than predicted by the front desk staff. I wasn't sure what to do. Ethan was hungry, and I had no food for him. I'll never the look on his face as he cried while we waited.
Then it was Ethan. This time we got an appointment, but it was a long drive. The people were great, and they did the best they could. However, it was scary for Ethan as two people in full PPE gear reached into the car. One of them help his arms down and his head still, while the other stuck the swab in his nose. I'll never forget his scream as they took his sample.
Both of my children were negative on their COVID-19 test and tested as a precaution, not because of known exposure.
The stress of waiting for your child's COVID-19 test results is a horrible experience that parents all across America have suffered through.
Yes, I am grateful that we could get my children tested and have the peace of mind that they did not have COVID-19. However, the challenges of COVID-19 testing for children are real and, in many places, are still left unaddressed.
Many people in power in America do not prioritize the needs of children. That much has always been clear. In 2020, people's lack of determination to do what is best for our nation's children led to dire consequences. If we don't care to make testing easy and accessible to children, it's no surprise that schools have failed to get needed resources while the number of children who do not have enough food to eat continues to skyrocket.
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