I have probably been to about forty children’s birthday parties since the birth of my first son, Ollie. I probably haven’t seen it all, but I’ve seen a lot. I’ve been to some amazing parties, and I’ve been to some that have been excruciating. So here’s a list of recommendation on how to make your child’s birthday party awesome.
1. Embrace the transition
Your child’s first birthday party is usually an adult party with some babies around. This is a celebration your child will not remember. It is more of acknowledgement of the hard work of the parents put in during the first year of that child’s life and a thank you to all the people who helped make that first year possible. So it’s perfectly appropriate to have activities, food, and drink that is more focused on the adults.
This slowly changes until around age 5 where birthday parties are not kid parties with some adults around. The priority is for your child to interact with their friends. Adults will get a chance to socialize but these conversations will be broken up by needing to attend to children. Food becomes pizza and juice, and that’s fine.
This transition will happen, but it can be a challenge to fully understand. It’s not that one type of party is better, you just need to learn to appreciate how they are different and find value in these different experiences.
2. Cupcakes
You have some activity, everyone eats, the child gets that happy birthday song sung to them and now everyone wants cake.
The process of cutting up a cake quickly and neatly, placing them on plates with utensils, and passing out these plates is almost impossible to do without a lot of help, and is not fun when you have children waiting for cake, which for many is the climax of the party. The answer: cupcakes. There’s no need for utensils, and you can even get away without plates. The wrappers mean that many adults can help pass them out without worrying about sanitation.
If you still a cake, I recommend buying a small cake for the candle blowing thing andbuy cupcakes to serve the majority of the people quickly.
3. Location, Location, Location
Do birthday parties at places that regularly do birthday parties. I know it doesn’t seem very creative or original to do birthday parties in the same places other families do them. However there’s a reason people use the same kids-themed play spaces: the staff knows what they are doing.
If you hold your child’s party at a place that regularly holds children’s birthday parties there staff will be ready for you. They will have a bin for presents, their staff will most likely help you set-up and clean-up. Sometimes they even pass out food, and help you load stuff in and out of your car.
If you want to do your child’s party at a place that doesn’t usually host children’s birthday parties, ask a friend to show up early and help you out, because chances are, the staff will do nothing.
4. Pizza
It’s really the perfect birthday party food. You can pre-plate the pizza and put them out on tables,so kids don’t have to grab their own food (children are HORRIBLE at buffet lines). Most children are happy with cheese pizza (and gluten-free pizza is not hard to come by). Set up the tables with some bowls of fruit, crackers, and some juice boxes and your are set. Some more adult-orientated food can be at a side table. I’m already sick of eating pizza and it’s only the beginning of the summer birthday season. However it works, so it’s best not to fight it.
5. Presents
Avoid having present opening be part of parties. It is socially awkward, children often loose interest in this process, and they aren’t very good at being polite when they don’t like a present.
If you want people to bring presents, tell them not to. It’s your party. If instead of doing presents you want them to donate to a charity, do a book exchange, or something completely different than say so on the invitation. Creating an experience that children can focus on the value of friendship through a shared experience over material gift is important.
6. Enjoy The Party
It’s really hard to plan children’s birthday parties. Just remember it’s not going to be perfect, and to take the time to enjoy the party yourself.
Stop hosting for a minute, find the smile in your child’s face and look around the room at all these people who are there for your child. Your child brought these people together to share love. That’s a magical, life-affirming, and powerful thing to witness and feel, so take a moment to experience this.
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