The view looks very different depending where you are standing, and if you look too closely at the cracks in the wall, you might miss the beauty of an entire building.
This first week of school, well two days of teacher meetings and two days of classes has been everything. There have been awesome highs, frustrating moments, welcomed reunions, and some challenging situations.
I see more than I have ever before. When I started ten years ago as a teacher I had a view of this school that was focused on myself and my immediate work. This was important because it was a tough year, and if I had too many other things outside of my specific job of teaching, I don’t think I would have made it.
Slowly my view on the school expanded. Becoming music department chair exposed to me the way the department was run and how the music department fit into the larger community. I began to think less about my work solely and more about how choices fit into the context of other department.
The view of the school completely opened up when I become co-diversity, equity, and inclusion chair. This position put in more meetings with administration, staff and other teachers outside of the music department that I didn’t know well and previously rarely interactions. Like eating the forbidden fruit, I couldn’t unsee and unknow all that I was learning about my school. From admissions to fundraising and communication, I became keenly away of the many different layers and perspectives that made up my school.
At any span of time in a school community there are amazing things that are happening, and challenging situations. This isn’t as clearly revealed when your perspective is more singular. However when you see as many different angles as I see, the ebb and flow of different parts of this school create a complex and challenging understanding of the organization.
It’s like trying to figure out the zeitgeist of the world by watching forty televisions all at the same time set on different channels. It’s almost overwhelming but amongst the noise, there is a feeling, and this week, even though some of those screens showed me things that were tough to deal with, the overall feeling was positive.
This is a wonderful school, and I feel fortunate and privilege to teach here. However, there is work to be done, and challenges that arise daily. There is more good than bad and at our core, there is hope optimism, and more of us who believe, then do not.
I’ve always believed that if you are more frustrated by what this school is not, then excited about what this school is, then perhaps it’s time you move on to another place. After ten years, I can say that I am still excited, and hopeful. I am frustrated at times, as I was this week, but that’s okay. It comes from a place where I believe that we can and should be better, not a resignation that things can never improve. Some of this is accepting perceived flaws as features and learning to enjoy the view, and processes for all of what this place brings to our students.
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