There are moments when I can see the future.
When you spend time with children, most of the time, what you see in the present, Ollie is an eight-year-old. He moves like one, he talks like one, and he thinks like one. Ethan is a three-year-old, impulsive like most toddlers, and more stubborn than you would expect. Lucas is very much a baby/early toddler. Full of energy, smiles that can light up and room, and the desire to connect.
There are times when they revert to earlier stages in their lives. Especially as the school year has begun reverting is typical. We have felt this in this house. Lucas is cuddlier, Ethan’s moods wildly shift, and Ollie has had some unexpected meltdowns. The beginning of a school year is very hard for children in the best of situations. Often when children work hard at school, they have nothing left when they get home, and they just can’t keep it together. This is more a feature than a flaw and often a result of their focus at school.
Then there are times when you get glimpses of who your children will become. Some of these moments are small and often very brief, but they are beautiful and inspire optimism.
I was watching Lucas look at a book earlier tonight. He was sitting on Ethan’s bed with his legs out straight in front of him. The book was so large on his body that it covered up his legs completely, and all you could see were his little toes sticking up over the end of the book. I tried to talk to him, and he responded, with a grunt,” and looked more deeply into this book.
I couldn’t help but laugh, envisioning his older self engrossed in a book, just wanting to be left alone to finish.
Ethan is an active child. He can be very physical at times and speak and yell very loudly. But, on the other hand, he is exuberant and silly and loves to make people laugh. But there are moments when he is quiet where I can tell he is thinking.
He’ll ask me a question, and instead of yelling or giggling, he’ll be quiet and still. Then he’ll look over at me and smile, flop into my arms for a quick hug, and then run off yelling. So much of Ethan’s thoughts out of his body through physicality and vocalization, but there are times when this becomes internal. This will be more and more the case as he gets older.
Ollie is eight years old and a 3rd grader. So much of what he does gives me glimpses of who he will become. The concentration I see when we play Chinese Chess, how more often than not he eats dinner nicely, and the beautiful questions he asks me about the world. I see the musician he will become when we play violin together, and I see the older brother he reads to Ethan and puts on Lucas shoes for him. There are still moments when he is more a child and needs help and direction, but there are many more moments that give us glimpses of himself as a young adult.
I am in no rush for my children to grow up. On the contrary, I love watching them be kids and embrace the innocent joys of childhood. And I love peaks of who they will become.
Like a great movie, I love watching the teaser trailer, but I am willing to wait for the movie.
No comments:
Post a Comment