Some parents deal with chronic medical conditions that shape the lives of children and their families. Some parents deal with the life-threatening illnesses of their children that are traumatic and resonate throughout their lives of parents. And all parents deal with fevers, flu, colds, and other viruses.
In our modern life, much of the stress and anxiety as parents come from how childhood illness affects work, school, activities, and siblings. This compounds the practical and emotional challenges of caring for a sick child. Parents should have the financial and job security to care for their sick child, but unfortunately, many do not. We do not live in a society that prioritizes children and families, and this is obvious and painful for many families when a child is sick.
Over time, I’ve become less stressed and anxious when my children get sick. I remember being so worried the first time Ollie had a fever. I was checking his temperature every ten minutes. I was horrified when I woke up to the sound of Ollie coughing when he had croup. When one of my children has a fever, I give them Tylenol and a croup cough, which still sounds horrible. But I know what to do to help with that.
One of the byproducts of the COVID-19 pandemic is that I am much more comfortable taking time off work to take care of my children when they are sick. In addition, I can apply many of the tools I set up and used during remote learning to sub plans so that my students can still have a productive music class even if there is no music substitute teacher. Also, the pandemic has given me a healthy dose of perspective about what are my real priorities in my life.
I was thinking about all of this as I sat on the couch with my sick 2-year-old Lucas last week during my spring break. During my time off, Lucas got over a cold, went to school for a day, developed double ear infections, and stayed home the rest of the week. While I did have work that I was hoping to catch up on and some errands I wanted to take care of, I was able to adjust my life and take care of him. We are very privileged to have access to great health care. So we were able to get Lucas diagnosed and treated in a timely way.
All of this made this experience of caring for Lucas strangely relaxing and calming. Lucas is not a cuddler like my second son Ethan. So it was kind of nice that he was snuggled up in my lap. He’s only two years old, but he’s still such a little guy, and he’s pitiful and helpless when he’s sick. It’s nice to know that even though he grows so fast, he still finds comfort cuddling up with me.
Part of me was annoyed that Lucas got sick, and it cut into my plans for my spring break. But more than that, I’m happy that I could be there for him when he needed me. That moment when his smile came back after feeling so sick, was beautiful.
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